Tuesday, April 16, 2013

RPDR s5e11 • Sugar Ball • 15 April 2013

Last time on RuPaul's Drag Race the queens made over gay military men into their drag sisters.  Roxxxy and Jinkx did wonders with their handsome, but less than ideal for drag men.  Alaska, Detox and Coco had gorgeous men who were ideal for drag, but they ended up in the bottom.  Detox and Coco lip synched and Coco was eliminated. 

We open with Roxxxy waxing philosophical about Coco's reason to be on RuPaul's Drag Race.  I am just not buying her theory.  She came to win, or to build her resume.  She didn't know Alyssa would be here, giving her an opportunity to rehash or relive old problems.  She did not come to make peace with her.  Why does it matter to you, anyway, Roxxxy?  What are you trying to make peace with yourself?

For the mini- challenge, each queen has to make a puppet in the likeness of a competitor and create a bit to perform.  Each seems to do alright, but Alaska wins the puppet bitch-fest.

Where my people at?  Where my people at?

The main challenge is themed "Sugar Ball."

No, not "Sugar Walls."

No, not those, either!

They have to create three looks for the runway:  Super Duper Sweet 16 Teenage Party Girl, Sugar Mama Executive Realness, and Candy Couture Edible Eleganza (make the outfit out of candy.)  Since she won the mini-challenge, Alaska earns an extra 15 SECONDS of access to the candy provided them, before the other girls were all grabbing at everything.  Geez, that's it?

On the Ru-thru she and Alaska share a joke.  Hmmm … that doesn't happen all the time, does it?  I mean, both are funny, and things do naturally happen.  This was set up, though.  Hmmmm … what does it mean?  Ru struggles to understand Jinkx's concept. Detox is enamored with her green outfit, but doesn't have any candy on it.  Curious.  Ru does not like Roxxxy's work.  He states it won't flatter her.    It's not finished, but I will say this — it looks decent enough for me to want to see her finish it.

Ru then lets them all know that they will be lip synching an opening number, like they do every year with the top 4.  Since Alaska won the mini-challenge, she will have to choreograph it.  Alaska doesn't dance?  Ruh-roh!

Roxxxy and Detox interview how Jinkx's dress preparation (hammering candy) is annoying them, and it FINALLY hits me.  I have figured out why I no longer like Roxxxy.  I get that this is a TV show, and that relationships on TV might not be the same as in real life.  If Detox complains in interview about Jinkx one moment, and then they are chummy a minute later when shown in the work room, it's genuinely possible that they were set up by a producer in the interview, and that they are genuinely happy in the workroom.  However, Roxxxy never seems to have happy moments with Jinkx.  She's mad 24/7.

Jinkx interviews that she realizes that Roxxxy is coming after her every chance that she gets.  I don't get why.  I'd prefer her to work on her own, instead of concerning herself with how to trip up Jinkx, or how horrible she is and doesn't deserve to be there.  Girl, every time you open your mouth, you become the green monster.  Yes, some past winners have been less than kind, but that's not a skill we want to reward.   For most contestants, they are trash talking each other one moment, and then supporting or befriending each other the next, or at least letting it go and concentrating on work.   Roxxxy is as tenacious as PhiPhi O'Hara in her singularity of focus — they just can't hate their victim enough.

I wonder if that means that Jinkx WILL automatically win?  There's a thought!

Additionally, Roxxxy is disrespecting not only Jinkx, but herself and Ru, too.  If one is unhappy with how the judging is going, complain TO THE JUDGES, not to the competitor.   Roxxxy is thumbing her nose at Ru, who may or may not award her the win, but by saying the judging hasn't been right or fair, Ru is being told she has f***ed up.  Is that the way to win a competition?

How do they make out?  Let's take a look:

Alaska Thunderfuck

Jinkx Monsoon

Roxxxy Andrews

Detox Icunt

The judges liked Alaska's choreography, but it was too simple.  Her three outfits are a hit.  Jinkx was best on the intro number.  Her three looks are uneven.  Santino whines that the candy outfit was a miss.  Roxxxy is commended for using candy in all three of her looks.  Her licorice outfit immerses Bob Mackie.  Detox is observed to look great on the outfits she brought from home, and poor in the one she had to make there that day.

When asked who should be eliminated, All except Jinkx mention her. Fair enough, but when it is coming to be Roxxxy's turn, she just can't get it out of her mouth quick enough. 

Jinkx!  Hurry!  Get rid of her RIGHT NOW!  She's a bomb!  Run!

During the critique rehash and recap, it's a little more even, with good and bad for everyone noted.  Well, except Roxxxy, who looks like she might win this.

Alaska wins!  She has two wins, and so does Roxxxy, who is safe.

Jinkx and Detox are in the bottom. They lip synch to "Malambo #1" by Yma Sumac.

Each seems to do alright, but maybe Jinkx is outshining the other?  Ah, Ru is of the same mind.  She keeps Jinkx and sends Detox on her way.

Maybe if you hadn't gotten along with Roxxxy, you'd still be here?

I don't know.  It's hard to be fair.  Roxxxy is skilled and gorgeous.  I just prefer my drag queens to be more focused on themselves than on others.  There's no need to bully anyone else in order to win.  Just be the best and win, eh?

You'd think that that would be enough!

Over on Untucked Roxxxy keeps going and going, but Alaska comes alongside Jinkx and is nice to her for a bit, for which she is grateful.  Detox is intermittently nice and mean to Jinkx. 

God, I'm SICK of Roxxxy already.  Please, Ru, no more PhiPhi's  / Roxxxy's, alright?  It's too draining.


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