Thursday, February 28, 2013

RPDR s5e5 • Snatch Game • 25 February 2013

Last week on RPDR the drag queens interpreted RuPaul's life through ballet.  Jinkx Monsoon and Coco Montrese won the Soul Train inspired dance off mini-challenge, so they became captains of the two teams for the main challenge.  Alyssa Edwards won the main challenge, while Vivienne Pinay and Honey Mahogany were in the bottom.  Why?  Vivienne was lackluster, and Honey kept repeating her caftan runway look.  Surprisingly, each merely lip synched to pass the time, instead of actually fighting to stay on the show, and BOTH were eliminated.

Okay, before we actually get into the show, let me gush a little bit.  I ADORE the Snatch Game episodes.   They didn't have one in the first season, but on s2, Pandora Boxx's Carol Channing and Tatianna's Britney Spears were genuine hits.  S3's Stacey Layne Mathews won the hearts of the judges.  At the last minute she switched from Anna Nicole Smith to Mo'Nique's portrayal of Mary Lee Johnston, the mother of Precious.  In s4 we were blessed with Chad Michaels' Cher, but there was a lot of fun going on in the top row with Willam's Jessica Simpson and Sharon Needles's Michelle Visage, too.  

It's morning in L.A., and RuPaul is stealing from Us Weekly for the mini challenge.   It is to take a Cuddler?  (Snuggie?) and make something red carpet-worthy.  Ian Drew from Us Weekly magazine states that Detox, Roxxy Andrews and Alyssa Edwards are the winners.

Jinkx Monsoon as one of the Olsen Twins did crack me up, though.  

Wait ... the winners aren't team captains, or get extra anything for the main challenge?  Huh?  They just won a little gift?

... and they get to participate on the season five Snatch Game!
That is prize enough, oui?

The girls start putting their Snatch Game looks together, and picking on each other's choices.  On the Ru-Thru, Ivy Winters can't convince Ru that she can make her Marilyn Monroe funny.   Ru wants Alaksa to be funnier than Lady Bunny is.  Coco's Janet Jackson has Ru begging for her to be funny.  Is there a pattern her?  Does she inherently KNOW they are all going to be UNfunny?  Detox is doing Ke$ha, but that seems easy, right?  Act drunk.  Celebrate booze.  How hard can THAT be?  Ru doesn't think that Jinkx's  Little Edie (Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy Onassis's down & out cousin) will resonate with the audience, although he is laughing along with Jinkx at the choice of character.  (Everyone else was told to be funny, and Jinkx is NOT being told that.  Hmmm...)    Lineysha wants to do Michelle Obama.  Ru acts like it can't be done.  She sets up Lineysha with a straight line, and Lineysha can't find the punch line.  How sad.

Look!  We have the Julie Browns as guest judges!

Wubba Wubba Wubba!

On the main challenge, I can't believe how many missed opportunities there were, especially from those that DO THIS SORT OF THING FOR A LIVING.

Jinkx as Little Edie never missed a beat.  
She took a lesser known character and hit a home run!

Jade seems to be hiding behind her Taylor Swift attire.
She's trying, I can see that.   I say she is swinging
and missing, as opposed to some who aren't
even bothering to swing.

Alaska is shining as Lady Bunny.
I agree with Santino & Michelle that the voice is wrong,
but she is so funny, and looking right, that I don't care.

Detox's Ke$ha seems a bit phoned in,
but this seems to be the easiest to do,
so I'm not too worried.

Coco Montrese as Janet Jackson misses a slow ball
from RuPaul right off the bat.  There's so MUCH she
could have said when RuPaul asked,
"What Have You Done For Me Lately?"
Coco/Janet could have just gone with
"Come Back To Me, you Nasty boy!"
To be fair, the voice was right on point.

Alyssa as Katy Perry also missed out!
When Ru asked if she had ever kissed a girl,
Alyssa/Katy replied, "No."
Did the summer of 2008 not even happen?

Ivy Winter's Marilyn Monroe I WILL take issue
with, for her not getting the whispery voice right.
She dropped the ball on this one, too, at times.

Lineysha ditched Michelle Obama and
went with Celia Cruz.   Wrong!  Her look was
more put together, like better drag,
than what Lineysha Sparkx wore.
She was a big deal in Latin music,
at least THAT could have been parlayed
into how she responded to Ru.
 What a let down!

Roxxy Andrews as Tamar Broxton jumped
right in and showcased her personality.
GOOD on you!  She's playing it right.

As far as the runway ...

Ivy Winters

Detox Icunt

Jade Jolie

Roxxy Andrews

Jinkx Monsoon

Coco Andrews

Alyssa Edwards

Lineysha Sparkx

Alaska Thunderfuck

It's pretty obvious before the judges say anything that this will be the top 3, middle 3 and the bottom 3:

1-3 • Jinkx Monson, Roxxy Andrews & Alaska Thunderfuck

4-6 • Coco Montrese, Alyssa Edwards & Jade Jolie

7-9 • Lineysha Sparks,  Detox Icunt & Ivy Winters

... and when they send the middle 3 off to the back room, you KNOW something's gong to happen over on Untucked.  I know that reading and throwing shade are considered skills to showcase in the world of drug, but at some point I would think it would be best to concentrate on one's own work.  Eye on the prize, not the competitor.

Jinkx wins the challenge!

Ivy is declared safe, and that means Detox and Lineysha are in the bottom.

Detox makes fun of Cher's machine gun vibrato, and that put her well ahead of poor Lineysha.

She was gorgeous and talented, but she earned her #9 placement.

I'll say!


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